13 July 2010

It Was Time

Yesterday I wrote the post below the asterisks and didn't get a chance to publish it.  Reading it makes me realize how much your life can change in a few short hours.  This morning Simon took a turn for the worse.  He was extremely lethargic and had a hard time moving around.  He was uninterested in his breakfast until I practically forced it on him.  His breathing was very shallow and he looked tired of fighting.  So, we made the call.  It was time to let him go.  My heart hurts and I hate how quiet the house feels.  But, we did right by him and that makes it slightly more bearable.  If you have a pet, please go hug him or her - I know Simon would like that.

*******************************************************

I want to start out by thanking everyone that has passed along a kind word or thought in my direction.  I appreciated every comment and every email that has been sent to me.  The words of understanding and empathy have been so comforting.

Simon has his good days and his bad.  He sleeps almost all day every day, only getting up for extended periods of time to eat and go for his short morning walk (both of which he still really enjoys).  The flashes of his mischievous, spunky personality are coming fewer and farther between lately.  Some days he is more feisty than others, but he is winding down. 

I keep reminding myself that his is a little old man (72 in human years if you believe the accepted conversion charts) and that he is fighting a losing battle.  I tell myself that he has had a splendid life.  He has always been surrounded by people that love him and he has had wonderful adventures.  He always had the softest beds, the tastiest foods and the squeakiest toys.

But its hard to see him faltering.  I keep asking myself how I will know it's time to say goodbye.  And I'm always torn between what's right for him and what's right for me.  I couldn't bear letting him linger beyond what is humane and loving, just so I can have one less moment of grief after his loss.  So, as of now, I have decided that when he loses the ability to enjoy his two greatest loves, eating and walking, it will be time.  I just hope I have the strength of will to be so selfless when the time comes.

136 comments:

CarlaF-in Atlanta said...

Shannon, I'm so sorry. I know you're sad but know there are people in the world who wish you and Simon well. Hang in there.

Alex said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself. it is such a hard thing to deal with.

Allison said...

Thinking of you Shannon. You did one final kind and loving thing, in his lifetime of many kind and loving things.

RIP Simon.

Megan Harmeyer said...

I just started following your blog this weekend - my heart aches for you. It's never easy to lose a member of the family! He's back to his spunky self now. Big hugs to you and the husband.

meredithp said...

I'm so sorry Shannon. I know it will be hard, but you definitely did right by Simon. He was a lucky dog, and I know you were lucky to have him.

jules said...

I will give my beloved Maxine an extra hug in your and Simon's honor...sending good thoughts of peace your way...

Claire S. said...

Shannon, I'm so sorry - I know how hard this is. Simon was well loved.

Sharon said...

Oh Shannon, how I feel for you and your husband. This is one of the hardest decisions but one that we have to make. Roscoe has just received a huge hug. Take care of yourself.

amber said...

Oh Shannon. :(

I'm sitting here crying for you. My mom had to have her baby put down last year - her first dog ever - and she was just broken. I'm so so sorry for you loss. You and your husband are in my thoughts. Big hugs and lots of love to you.

Spooky Girl said...

My sympathies for you two at this time.
From all your posts, you did Simon proud and that is worth so much.

Lots of good vibes to you.

Maryissewfast said...

Dear Shannon, My heart goes out to you...may Simon rest in peace and peace to you and your husband...his human parents.

Marybeth said...

I'll keep you and your little baby in my thoughts and prayers...

Andrea said...

I'm so sorry about Simon! I've been reading your blog for a while, and it was clear from your posts what an incredible bond you shared with him. Thank you for sharing his story, even in the hardest moments.

Sharon-Lynn said...

I'm so very sorry. You did the right thing for Simon... it is so terribly hard to say goodbye to a much-loved pet, and I hope it's a comfort to know that he is no longer suffering.

From a fellow Ontarian who's had to make that call for several beloved kitties. It doesn't get easier, but the heartache does diminish with time. Many hugs to you and to Simon from me and my two cats, Mischief and Ciara.

KID, MD said...

Oh, I'm so sorry. I know he had a wonderful life with you.

Lilian said...

I'm so sorry Shannon. 5 years ago I had to make a similar decision. It was so hard but at the same time the only one that was right.
3 weeks after it happened I still couldn't talk about it without crying, but time took care of that.
Time will take care of you too. You'll be ok.

Farah said...

I am so, so sorry. I just found your blog, so I feel I hardly know you, but you and your husband are in my thoughts tonight. Take care of yourself.

Ann Made Studio said...

Oh Shannon I am so sorry, my heart goes out to you and your husband.
I will give my Bradley a hug for Simon. Take Care.

Toby Wollin said...

Shannon - Hugs to you and your husband. Simon is beyond suffering now; you did the kind thing, the thing that a true friend would do for another friend. So, if you have something cold and alcoholic in the fridge, raise a glass to Simon and the time when you will all meet again.

okie2thfairy said...

My heart aches for your loss. I gave Chloe a hug as tears rolled down my cheeks-she didn't know why. You did the right thing and he's better off for it even though it breaks your heart.

Rose said...

Shannon

I'm sorry for you and your family's loss. What a very sad decision to make. I'm so sorry.

Rose in SV

Colleen said...

That is such a difficult decision to make but you did do right by him. I could tell by your blog how much he was loved. I am sorry!

BeeBee said...

I'm so sorry, I hope you continue to remember him with smiles and know you did the right thing in letting him go peacefully.

Vicki said...

I am so sorry for you and Simon. But as you say, he had a good life. Hopefully sewing can fill the void just a bit.

Carolyn (Diary of a Sewing Fanatic) said...

I'm so sorry! I'm sure he knew how much you loved him.

Anonymous said...

Shannon, my sympathies to you and your husband. I have put down two pets and know how it feels. Please take care.

Peggy said...

I'm sorry. . .

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for the loss of your little one. You and Simon are in my thoughts.

Joanne said...

I am sorry, it hurts so much to lose a beloved critter. Be kind to yourself while you grieve.

Cherie said...

I have to come out of lurkdom to say how sorry I am. I know how hard it is, we've had to make that call also. Blessings to you and hubby as you remember good yikes. I have enjoyed your posts of Simon!

Lisette M said...

Simon was one lucky beagle. I'm going to hug my beagle right now.

Linda said...

I have been dreading this post. How lucky Simon was to have a wonderful owner like you.

gwensews said...

I am truly sorry. Sending blessings and wishes for your hearts to heal.

Shelley said...

Shannon, I'm sorry for your loss. You've had a long haul with Simon. A hard decision to make. It's amazing how memories can come flooding back as time passes. Good memories -- dogs are such good friends. Hope the good memories can sustain you in weeks to come.
And....when you're ready, after some time has passed, I hope you get another dog. Dogs give such unconditional love in their own unique ways. No need to go without that unconditional love for too long!

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, Shannon. Shed lots of tears and then feel better soon.
Martha

Linda T said...

Just crying with you.

Susan said...

Oh bollix Shannon, I'm so sorry. Our blue Burmese girl died almost 12 months ago and my heart still aches at times due to the lost love, affection and companionship. Will give my other girls a hug for Simon when I get home from work but also sending you warm thoughts and empathy.

NancyDaQ said...

Oh, how sad! It's hard to let them go, yet we know that someday we must. Please know that Simon knew he was treated like a prince among dogs and appreciated all the love you gave him.

wendy said...

Oh my goodness- a big hug, I know how exhausting and shocking and really really sad this is! He knows how much you loved him, for sure. I hope that you make it through ok. It's really heartbreaking to lose your best friend!

Linda said...

Hugs to you, Shannon, for doing that final loving act for Simon. I have been there several times, and the one comfort I can give is that the grief eases in time, while the memories remain forever.

Penny said...

I am so sorry to hear about Simon. It sounds like you were very brave, which is doing the difficult thing when you fear doing it. I just gave my own dog a hug and a treat. She says, in her own language, thanks, Simon, for being an inspiration.

Anonymous said...

Shannon, I am so very sorry.

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear this sad news. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Carol said...

Vale Simon. Thinking of you.

Ali'sNailNews said...

I am SOO sorry for your loss. :-( Simon was very lucky to have you. I know how hard it must have been, but at least he's not sick any more. Take good care of yourself. Sending lots of good thoughts and prayers your way. *HUGS*

Gail said...

I'm so sorry.

Dana said...

So, sorry to hear this.

Sassy Jen said...

I'm so sorry to hear about Simon. Your heart breaks in that moment when you know what has to be done for your animal. It's hard to make the call, but there is no other option when you want to prevent suffering. Take care and know we're thinking of you.

Soldier Grrrl said...

Know that Simon will be well met by so many loved pets that have gone before him. Our Gina and Freckles will be waiting for him.

For now, I'm going to go cuddle Moose and Moxie and tell them how loved they are.

*hugs*

Lisa said...

Sorry for your loss.

Antoinette said...

I'm so very sorry. I hope it brings some momentary consolation that he knew until the end how much he was loved.

Jean said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I just hugged our Simon the cat and let him know how much we love him. Take care.

Unknown said...

I just wanted to send my condolences, and to tell you that letting go was the bravest thing you could do for him. Now ha is not suffering and I am sure that he will always look after you and your husband.
Sending you a BIG hug...

Danielle said...

Such a beautiful dog, I am sorry for your loss.

Janis said...

Hugs to you Shannon. May you always have wonderful memories of your very sweet boy.

Janis

gMarie said...

Shannon - there just aren't words. I have tears running down my face and hope that I can be as brave and selfless as you when the time comes.

I will keep you, your husband and Simon in my thoughts. g

Reethi said...

Shannon, I'm so sorry. Biscuit is being hugged right now, whether she wants to be or not....

Karen said...

Shannon, I hate hearing that Simon's time came, but you're a good mom to do what's best for him, no matter how much it hurts. He was a loved and happy boy, and I'm sure he couldn't have asked for any better than he got.

Hugs and best wishes and the grumblings of several cats who just got squeezed on Simon's behalf.

lsaspacey said...

Oh, I am so sorry to read this. Always remember that he was truly loved and is now watching over you as you have watched over and taken care of him. Take care.

Trudy said...

Shannon, I am so so sorry to hear this. I know how much Simon meant to you.

Debbie Cook said...

I am so, so sorry for you and your husband, and poor, poor Simon. He was definitely loved more than you can ever express but that doesn't make it any easier to have watched him these last few weeks and to make this decision. Hugs to both of you, and hugs to my brood in honor of dear, sweet Simon. May you find peace and happy memories soon.

Kelsey said...

Shannon, I know what you are going through. One week ago my parents, brother and I had to make the difficult decision to have our family cat, Sammy, put to sleep. She was 17 years old, in very poor health, and it was obvious to all of us that she was ready to go. We had gotten her as a 4 month old kitten when I was 12 years old. Growing up, she was really my cat. She slept with me every night and sat on my lap whenever I cried.

I moved out of my parents' house six years ago and since then I'd gotten married and adopted two cats of my own, but Sammy was still always there for me whenever I visited my parents. I will always miss her.

I hope that with time we can both heal and that the old, happy memories will be just that - happy.

Love, Kelsey

AllisonC said...

So sorry to hear your news; you are right though he did have a splendid life. I hope you feel better soon and will remember all the good times. x

Uta said...

I'm so sorry, and hope you'll feel better eventually. The community will miss the sewing beagle!

patsijean said...

Oh, Honey, I am so sorry. I have been anticipating and dreading the reading of this news; but, you are correct, you did what was best for Simon. He was an old man, and he lived the life he deserved. I will hug our Sheltie, Duncan, in honor of Simon the Beagle.

Lina said...

I'm so sorry.

Elaray said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's very hard to lose a well-loved pet.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've been following Simon's adventures and journey for some time now and I've always been touched by how much you love him.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry Shannon. I have tears in my eyes for you because I know what it feels like. Take care,
Heather

Gail said...

Hugs to you, and to my ill mannered, bad breath doggie Alf.

Helen said...

This is such a sad time for you. You did the right thing by Simon - you always have. I wish you all the strength you'll need to get through this. From the photos on your blog and your Simon stories, I know he was a beautiful, special friend to you. And as you told us to, I've just given Jesse, Angel, Charlie and Winnie a hug and a tickle in honour of Simon. Best wishes from my furry and feathered family.

angelique van der Velde said...

he will always be in your heart.
i pooch-sit a 13yr old dalmatian who is currently sick. ive hugged him a million times today & an extra just for simon :-)
take care hun

Chris said...

Shannon, I am so sorry for your loss.

Nancy K said...

I send lots of hugs. Having just lost our 18 year old Nicky I know how you feel. He saved us the decision to end it, but no matter how our dearly loved animal goes, it is still difficult and lonely without our beloved pet.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and your husband as you grieve for your little man.

Marie-Christine said...

Oh, how utterly sad. He did have a good life, but dog lives are so short... Big hugs.

Becky said...

I'm so sorry, Shannon-- I know how hard of a decision that is to make. But I know he also had the best life he could have possibly had as a member of your family.

Marsha said...

Very sorry to hear about the loss of your faithful companion. My thoughts are with you...

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Your love for Simon has shone through everything you've said about him. He is missed and remembered by all of us who follow you from cyberspace.

fiberchick said...

So sorry to hear about Simon. Sounds like you were both lucky to find each other in this life... I hope his passing becomes remotely bearable soon...

Jen said...

I'm so sorry Shannon. Simon had a great, happy long life and had lots of love, he was one lucky boy to have you.

Biba said...

I'm so sorry!

Take care *hugs*

Nichole McCormick said...

Shannon,

So sorry for your loss. You are selfless and brave. My thoughts are with you and your husband.

Many hugs,
Nichole

Tesla said...

I am so sorry for your loss.

Brooke said...

You are in my thoughts today.

Kurage said...

I am so sorry for your loss. You gave him an amazingly happy life and I think you made the right decision. I'm going to go hug my mastiff in honor of Simon, may he forever rest in peace.

Ann said...

I am sorry to hear about Simon. I know exactly how you feel. We had to put down our 19 year old cat (90 yrs old on conversion charts) in June due to old age liver shut down. Our thoughts are with you and your husband at this time. Think of all the positive things you did with Simon and how you gave him such a wonderful life.

Rachelle said...

Oh, Shannon, I'm so sorry for your loss. You've been a wonderful dog-mom.

Mardel said...

Shannon, I am so sorry for your loss. When you described Simon this morning, you could have been describing my Tori one morning last January, and it brought back all of those sad memories. Hugs. Simon was so lucky to have such a wonderful mom.

Myrna said...

I'm sorry. HUGS.

Debbie F said...

Shannon I am so sorry....I will share hugs and tears for Simon with my Ginger...God Bless you.

cityfarmer said...

"He has always been surrounded by people that love him and he has had wonderful adventures. He always had the softest beds, the tastiest foods and the squeakiest toys."

This is what it's all about, Shannon, and loving him enough to let him go is one more indication of what a lucky - and loved - little man he was.

This sort of thing is never easy; I've had to do it, too, and my heart goes out to you.

I'm so sorry.

Lee

Heather said...

My thoughts are with you. I'm so sorry about your sweet pup. Sounds like he had one terrific doggie life! I hope your memories of him will comfort you now.

Michelle said...

I'm so sorry Shannon.

sarajane said...

I'm so sorry. Even though it really sucks, it was the right thing to do.
Hang in there.

Little Hunting Creek said...

I'm so sorry! We just said goodbye to our dog Chelsea last month. It's so hard! Please know that you did the right thing.

lauraborealis said...

I am so sorry. What a sweet boy. I'm glad that you had the time you did together.

Connie B said...

Oh, I'm so sad for you. I know how devestating losing a beloved friend can be. Remember the happy times, and know that many of us are grieving with you.

Ellen said...

I've been in your shoes before, and my heart breaks with you.

Sz said...

A huge hug to you. It it so difficult to make this decision, but that is the agreement we make with our fur babies. I know what you're going through.

Dawn said...

Deepest sympathy to you and your family

Sew Wilde said...

I am so sorry for your loss! It is always hard to let a beloved pet go.

Julie

Rose said...

I'm off to give my 15 year old cat, Harry, a hug from Simon. Here's a hug for you, too.

mitch1066 said...

Im so sorry for your loss,we are in waiting mode with our 12 year old lab.She's covered in tumours and doesnt go for walks anymore .Hubby has decided when she cant eat or cant do her business outside then it will be time.We are dreading it,she is such a big part of our life

mochimo said...

I am so sorry. I can't stop tears to roll down my face.
A big hug.
Monica

snowflakes said...

I have been through this and it is one of the hardest things to go through. My heart still aches for my "Chance after 6 years"
Hope this poem will help with the healing:


Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

Jan (from England) said...

Oh Shannon, we are so sorry for your loss and big hugs from us and our felines to you. We'll all have a big hug in Simon's memory. You enjoyed such wonderful times together and I hope those memories are of some comfort.

Colette said...

=( Even when you know it's time, it's never easy. They trust us to do the right thing & I know that you did, as you said you can tell when they are sick of fighting. I will for sure go hug my 2 pets, Dude who is only 4 but has had a bad hip since he was a puppy, and my "kitten" Frisky who I learned last vet visit is 92 in cat years at age 19. We can only love them as best we can while we have them <3

denise@thebluegardenia.com said...

I know how hard it is. You are in my thoughts.

ReaderRita said...

I will admit that I was afraid to visit this site today, because I was afraid that this might be the news-

Shannon, I am so sorry for the loss of your wonderful fur-boy. My sympathies to you and your hubby.
I know that it was a miserable decision, though it certainly was a brave one- and the right thing for him. You absolutely found the strength to be selfless when the time came.
( I, too have had to make that decision. No matter how "prepared" you are for it, you never actually are...)

My three gals are all getting hugs now, much to their chagrin.

Best wishes and big hugs to you and yours-

Summerset said...

I am so sorry. I know how hard to have made this decision. This is the same point I came to with my boy, Max. I knew it was the right time and didn't want him to suffer. Hugs to you!

Gail D. said...

Oh, Shannon, I know how your heart aches. I greatly respect you for putting Simon's welfare ahead of your own. Trust me when I say that you'll remember and love him always, and the pain will become more bearable everyday. I'm hugging my little chihuahua, Nacho, as I write this, and my heart aches with yours.

Best, Gail D.

tarabu said...

When I saw the title in my blog feed my heart lurched. Those first few mornings when you still go to make his breakfast with yours will be gut-wrenching, but the pain will fade and the multitude of happy memories will swell as the days go by. Being strong enough to let him go may be the greatest thing you have done for him.

Linda said...

Shannon: I am so sorry to hear your news. Rest in the knowledge that you gave him a wonderful life and every bit of care possible. Hugs to you! Linda

Mary Beth said...

I'm sorry, Shannon. Good Dog, Simon, you let Mom know when it was the right time. Good Dog.

Anonymous said...

Hearing of your loss saddens me. Sometimes the right decisions are the hardest to make I think. Thank you for all the bits of Simon's great life that you shared with us on this blog. All little treasures to remember him by for always.

Anonymous said...

RIP Simon and thanks for sharing all the pics of the gorgeous beagle boy. So sorry for your loss.

Fran said...

I'm so sorry Shannon. It sounds like he had a wonderful life with you.

R.M. Koske said...

My sympathies as well. That's so very hard. I'm glad you had the time to cherish him extra before the moment arrived. Take care of yourself, and you're in my thoughts.

Stacy said...

RIP Simon.:( I've been through this with a pet before, and it's true, you really do just KNOW when it's time to make that decision. Sending thoughts of strength and comfort your way.

Sue said...

<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>
You have my thoughts & I'm hugging Dillon the Dobermann as I remember having to make the decision twice last year with our previous dogs. Love to you & take time to grieve, he was family.

Anonymous said...

So very sorry to hear that. Sounds like you had a wonderful time before you had to say goodbye, and it's clear he had a wonderful life with you. Take care of yourself.

Nancy Winningham said...

So sorry to hear about Simon. But, you're right - it was time. Because you loved him so much, you will have many wonderful memories that you will look back on fondly for years to come.

Sewellen said...

Hugs to you, Shannon. Right now, Simon is chasing rabbits, running in tall grass, eating out of garbage cans, and all the other things dogs do when they go to their special heaven. I'm sorry for your loss....

Wendy said...

Oh sweetie I am so very sorry for your loss. I miss my Boo and Toffee every day, I've not stopped missing one bit. BUT, I know they are waiting for me and that they would be HIGHLY ticked if they thought I was crying over them. I suspect Simon would be the same way. I hope the three of them are up there playing together. I'm sending prayers and hugs.

Much Love,
Wendy

MelissaL88 said...

Shannon, I'm so very sorry for your loss. I know what it's like to make that decision for a most beloved pet. Be assured that you made the right decision for him. And know that he'll be waiting for you on the other side of the Rainbow bridge.

Laura said...

Shannon, so sorry to hear of your loss. Over the years I have followed your blog, I enjoyed reading your entries of how special he was to you and your husband. He was really a gorgeous dog and did not look his 14 years! Life you you and hubby must've been very wonderful for him. How lucky he was to have spent his life with you both. My prayers go out to you.

Annette said...

I'm so sorry. You did have the courage to do the right thing.

Terri K said...

Shannon, you have so many good memories of the many years you two shared, and you'll never forget him. Like all of us who have had to make that decision for our dog friends, whom we loved so dearly for as long, believe me, he knew you loved him.

Rest in Peace Simon the now famous sewing beagle.

Anonymous said...

Oh Shannon, words just seem so inadequate at this time.

Hold hard to the knowledge that you loved Simon as much as was humanely possible, and he loved you back with all his little doggy self. Sleep well, Simon.

Hugs to you and hubby, you are all in our prayers.

Leslie in Austin said...

I am so very sorry, Shannon.

Kathleen C. said...

I am so, so sorry for your loss. I empathize deeply and know that you will miss Simon so much. But I hope it can give you some comfort to know that he had the best life a cared for, snuggled, happy, and well loved pet could ever have. You were the best friends any dog could ask for.

pink drops said...

Lots of hugs for you guys.XXX

DDinDFW said...

I'm so sorry, but you did what was right for Simon. And, you recognized when it was time - the most merciful thing you could do... for Simon. It was a hard decision for you but the right thing for Simon. I hope that soon your memories of Simon bring smiles instead of tears.

JustGail said...

Rest in Peace sweet Simon. Extra hugs will be given to all my furry children tonight in his honor. And hugs to you Shannon.

gina said...

I'm so sorry. Extra hugs and cuddles will be given to my kitties tonight in Simon's honor.